Once upon a time

Let’s start a story…

Walter walked across the street towards the grocery store. He saw Susie and waved but she didn’t see him. Just then…

By Chris Tingom

Principal of Tornado Design, a Phoenix, AZ based web consultancy

31 replies on “Once upon a time”

But the grocery clerk saw the pesky ‘coons and rushed through the doors with his broom, nearly tripping on Mr. Tomms, the MYSTERY writer who lived in the flat above the store.

Laut fluchend gestikulierte dieser mit den Armen. “Passen sie doch auf!” schrie er und liess beinahe den Karton mit Reagenzgläsern fallen, welche er für sein neuestes Experiment gekauft hatte.

“Can somebody please turn on the English subtitles?” asked walter, “I can’t understand German.”
“Press menu on the DVD remote.”
“I can’t see the stupid remote buttons in the dark, Susie—ergh, this is frustrating! Somebody turn the lights on!”
“That means I have to get up. You do it, Walter, you’re standing up already!” Robert did not want to move from his favorite chair.
“Now the sound is messed up—this technology never works. And I don’t even want to watch this movie. Why do we always have to watch foreign films anyway?!”

“CUT!” bellows the director…
“Thats it! It’s strike-time, I am SICK and TIRED of WAITING on you PATHETIC HUMANS to get this crap right!!!” Bobby Coon is short tempered and very manipulative and convincing in the N.U.F.R.L. (National Union for Racoon Laborers).
Sean, the director, attempts to maintain his composure as his lips quiver from frustration, “Now we have to find different attack animals! *sniffles* What am I going to do?”
Just then, the cast finds the remote when…

he had a delivery for Suzie, who mistakenly called for her standard pizza delivery – which is set to speed dial 9 – when she thought she was dialing 911.

The pizza man turned out to be an undercover FBI angent. He threw the fake pizza box away and pulled a giant rocket launcher out of his coat, but …

Although Suzie was shocked to see the rocket launcher, she couldn’t help but wonder, at least for a second, why the pizza man was wearing such a heavy coat. It’s not that cold in Arizona — yet…

In fact, turns out the FBI agent was in charge of this year’s “snow angels for the children” charity event. He was coming to make sure the fake snow was piled nice and high for the event.

Of course, the coon didn’t realize this at the time he pulled the trigger. Just the sight of the agent made him nervous that he might find out the truth that he’s been hiding so long about…

…frustrated by Smith’s amazing speed, the coon shot again and again and again until he emptied the 30 round magazine of his M-16 to no success. He was about to give up when a thought came to him. The coon suddenly did something that even Agent Smith couldn’t anticipate. He…

leaped across the room and wrapped his paws around the startled agents legs, tripping him as they fell toward..

… into a boiling pit of lava!—which, I admit, has no place being in the middle of a movie-director’s screening room.
“Plot realism! I need plot realism!” Screamed Agent Smith as he plummeted toward his doom.

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